/*amazon_ad_exclude = "christian"*/ The Skin I Am In: A Quickie

Friday, November 28, 2008

A Quickie

This is just something I jotted down on a piece of cardboard a while back as I suddenly felt inspired at one of my children's softball games. I could turn it into a much longer post, but will leave it simple for now:

While it isn't the responsibility of others to endow our emotional needs, common philosophy says that love makes the world go 'round. So while we alone must find happiness for ourselves, a life without love is a lonely one indeed. Perhaps truly healthy relationships are those which are maintained not out of need or the sense that the other person "completes" you, but instead of the desire and ability to enhance one another's lives. Simply put: We shouldn't need our partners, but want them.

2 comments:

Ferd said...

Right on, sister!
During my singlehood after divorce, I remember taking a couple of trips to beautiful places. I felt an emptiness that came from not sharing the experience with someone I loved.
To me, NEEDING someone implies codependency. I believe true love occurs when one healthy, independent person CHOOSES (wants) to devote his time, attention, and effort for the benefit of another similarly healthy and independent person. We should be able to be ourselves in our relationship, different from the other. We should each have our own life, and we should choose to overlap/share our lives to some degree, but not the point of choking and suffocating.
It sounds like you have the same general idea, right?

BTW, your posts come up on my dynamic blogroll, so I knew that you posted this. Don't think I'm stalking! ; )

Lori Whitwam said...

Hmm. I WANT my husband, but I'm pretty sure I NEED him, too. And that isn't always a good thing. Darn, it's almost bed time and I don't want to think! UG! But you're right, and it does bear thinking about. Maybe you'll turn it into a full-length post someday.